The Queen
by Roruna
Summary: One shot about some of Sybil's thoughts and feelings during that part in The Fifth Elephant when she's held hostage by bandits. The mood to write this struck me suddenly and at random. Hope you like it.


_Author's note: One shot about Sybil's thoughts and feelings during the trip to Uberwald in __The Fifth Elephant__, particularly when Sybil is taken hostage by the bandits. It's a bit soppy in some parts. These are innermost thoughts and feelings we're talking about after all. I had to use quite a few quotes from The Fifth Elephant too, by the way.  
_

_P.S. I don't own Discworld. I don't even own the fifth elephant that fell of the back of A'tuin. But I do own a copy of __The Fifth Elephant__. _XD

Sybil was developing mixed feelings about this trip to Uberwald. She was disappointed that it probably wouldn't stay a quiet, relaxing trip for much longer. But some little part of her was actually excited about the possibility of real adventure. She felt rather ashamed about that part. She definitely did not want to mention this to Sam because it seemed like the kind of thing that would offend him. He'd probably say something about this not being a game but that wasn't why she was excited, even if she did give off a nonchalant attitude about Sam's work.

She acted nonchalant because she knew no matter what kind of trouble Sam got into; he always got out of it all right. That had taken some time to realize of course. Sure the first few times that laundry girl told her about the bloodstains that were days old, Sybil would stare at Sam, trying to figure out if he was a ghost or not. This gave him the creeps every time she did it. The worst times were when Carrot or the other watchmen would bring Sam home with some stab wound or horrible bruises. She always coped well and tended to him as only a Ramkin woman knows how but once she was sure he was out of danger, she'd have to lock herself in a room so she could have a good cry in private.

Gradually she had learned to ignore the gut twisting fear and eventually she didn't need to cry. She learned to be jolly grateful that he was always all right. Every night, at least every night she went to bed before he got home, she would remind herself that he was all right, no matter what. What she was excited about was the fact that this trip would give her a unique insight into Sam's life. It is not unheard of that a change of atmosphere could bring a couple closer and she did want to be closer especially now that she was pregnant. But she really wanted to… meet the Sam Vimes that chased villains over rooftops and fought for his life everyday.

The closest she had ever come to meeting that Sam Vimes was before they got married, during that business with the dragon. That was the Sam Vimes she fell in love with and she hadn't seen him in years. She hated thinking this but she was quite sure that if she added up all the time that she had actually spent with Sam, it would probably add up to… six weeks, though that was still longer than most of the women in her family had spent with their husbands over the years. She sighed and looked down at her lap. Well, actually she was looking at her belly and trying not to smile too much.

She was vaguely aware of Mr. Skimmer rifling through his briefcase and muttering to himself, but just vaguely. Her mind was currently occupied with the idea of her baby. That had been rather unexpected for her. She had gone to see Mrs. Content feeling quite sure and mildly disappointed that she was going through 'the change' and had been so happy to find out that Mrs. Content disagreed. She was already sure she was having a boy. She knew in her heart of hearts that she would give Sam a son. She just wished she could get Sam to sit still long enough to tell him. Honestly, what did she have to do to get the man's attention, rob a bank?

Sybil felt the coach stop and Mr. Skimmer stepped out of the coach quickly with some cursing. _Here it comes, gel. You really should be careful what you wish for. _There was a lot of commotion outside and Sybil pulled the little window curtain back to see what was going on. She saw Mr. Skimmer move very un-clerk like and hit a man with the edge of his hand, slicing the man's head clean off. "Huh." She heard a creak inside the coach and when she turned there was a man pointing a crossbow at her.

Normally, this wouldn't have worried her too much. Mr. Skimmer had mentioned that there was slight bandit activity and she'd encountered bandits at least once before as a child traveling with her aunt. Normally, she would have scolded the man or found something, anything to use as a weapon. Normally, she would have at least slapped the man's stupid grin right off his face. But the man was pointing the crossbow at her stomach and some primitive and very annoying instinct screamed in Sybil's mind. _Don't hurt my baby. _He couldn't have known she was pregnant but he at least knew that getting shot in the stomach was a slow and painful way to die. "And now, Lady Vimes, you and I are going to step out of the coach. I suggest that you stay calm and let the men handle this."

Sybil couldn't stop herself from rolling her eyes. She thought with some bitterness that she probably wouldn't get a chance to teach the man some manners. Sam gets to have all the fun. There was something… Should she warn the man about Sam? Nah, let him be surprised. The man moved the crossbow as she turned to the door and opened it. She felt the tip of the crossbow digging into her back. The man put his arm around her shoulders and nudged her forward.

_"Everybody stop!" _

Sybil stepped out of the coach with the man close behind her. She felt herself shaking and was ashamed. You're not afraid. She told herself. You're just cold. There is no reason at all to be afraid. But it's snowing and that is reason enough to be cold. She looked around. The snow was drifted slowly downward and even though there were a few fires there were so many clumps of pure darkness. She couldn't see Sam anywhere and clearly the other man couldn't either.

"_I know you're here, Your Grace Vimes! And here is your lady. And there are many of us! Come out, Your Grace Vimes!"_

Sybil sighed and shook her head. It dawned on her that they were no longer in Ankh-Morpork. No one in Ankh-Morpork would actually pull a stunt as idiotic as using her to get to Sam. It was like kicking a swamp dragon. The dragon may blow up but it will take the leg that kicked it with him. She whispered softly, so softly that it was likely the man didn't hear her. "Don't be stupid, man. You don't know him." Her voice was perfectly steady but despite all her efforts, she couldn't stop shaking. She couldn't understand it. That man wasn't going to kill her. Firstly because Sam wouldn't let that happen and secondly this man was just some two bit bandit with delusions of great villainy.

_"It is like chess, Your Grace Vimes! We have disarmed the troll and the dwarf! And now I have the queen! And if you shoot at me, can you be sure I won't have time to fire?" _

Sam hates chess and royalty… Why was she thinking about that? Maybe it was to distract herself from the fact that this man had just threatened to shoot her. She clenched her fists, ordering herself to stop thinking like that. You'll be fine. Everything will be just fine. You're not going to die here. Your life will not be ended by this man. She told herself this over and over. She just wished that that damned little part of her that was panicking on behalf of her unborn child would get a grip. All thoughts stopped by the sound of Vimes' crossbow landing in the snow.

_"Well done, Your Grace Vimes! And now yourself, if you please!" _

Sam hates when people call him 'your grace'. You really should have learned more about him before trying to take him. Sybil saw a figure just outside the light, holding up his hands. She hadn't realized she had been holding her breath. Warm relief washed over her. She should have felt embarrassed about how reassuring Sam's presence was. Reassuring wasn't even the right word for it. There probably wasn't a word for how Sybil felt around Sam. She could get on with life whether he was home or not but… well, it was actually a lot like that talent Carrot had for making everything background to himself.

For Sybil, there was Sam and there was everything else. Everything became background to him; sounds faded, colors muted and sensations dulled. At least sounds, colors and sensations not relating to Sam did. Even Carrot was background. He commanded her attention that way a forest fire commands attention. She sometimes worried that Sam would find out just how zealous her devotion to him was and laugh. Not that she would blame him. She was hopelessly devoted.

_"Are you all right, Sybil?"_

He speaks. Speak again, bright angel. She wanted to say something painfully honest like, as long as I'm near you, I'll always be all right. But her sensibility was in control, as usual. That was a blessing really, Sam probably won't even know how to respond to a heartfelt confession about the nature of Sybil's feelings anyway. It was rather funny that even though they were married, sometimes Sybil felt like she was suffering from unrequited love. She said she was a bit cold. If he could see her shaking, she couldn't bear the thought of him thinking she might be scared.

_"You're not hurt?"_

Sybil shook her head very slowly and carefully, vaguely aware that the man was still pointing a crossbow at her. She said no. The man tightened his grip and Sybil felt the crossbow press against her a little harder.

_"Keep your hands where I can see them, Your Grace Vimes!" _

_"And are you going to promise me you'll let her go?"_

She had half a mind kick the man in the nadgers. How dare him. How dare he steal Sam's attention from her? It was hard enough to get Sam to focus without idiots waving deadly weapons around. She watched as a flame lit up Sam's face for a moment as he lit his cigar. Fire. Oh, how Sybil loved fire.

_"Now, Your Grace Vimes, why ever should I do that? But I am sure Ankh-Morpork will pay a lot for you!" _

Sybil almost wanted to laugh. Could this man really be so stupid? Never mind not knowing Sam's reputation but he must have at least heard stories about Ankh-Morpork. Ankh-Morpork is a wicked, sinful and conniving place, at least that's what most foreigners and several locals thought.

_"Ah, I thought so. Sybil?"_

_"Yes, Sam?"_

_"Duck."_

Sybil hit the ground without a thought. Forget if Sam says 'jump', Sybil says 'how high'. She looked up and saw Sam's hand move from behind him and there was a glint of light. What was he holding? There was a tiny sound and then the bandit's head flung back and he hit the ground. She didn't get a chance to see what hit the man because she felt Sam grab her and get her into the coach. There was a scream and then nothing. Sybil felt her heart pounding in her ears and now she was shaking so violently, she was sure she'd come apart.

She tried to think of something else as the terror finally started to creep into her brain. It was damn silly really, the danger was over. Why was she feeling scared now? She looked around. _"Where's Mister Skimmer?"_

_"Forget him!"_

_"But he's—"_

_"Forget him!"_

That embarrassing devoted part of Sybil's brain told her off for questioning Sam. She sighed quietly as the coach started to move forward again. To distract herself, she found herself focusing on the state of her dress. The little flakes of snow that had stuck to it were already melting, leaving her feeling cold and damp. She was still shaking and she told herself it was because of the cold wet snow. She hadn't been scared, she reminded herself. She had not been scared for her life or for the life of her baby. To be scared would mean that she didn't trust that Sam would sort it out and to not trust Sam was blasphemy.

The coach stopped in the yard of an inn. Sybil watched Detritus jump off the coach and slot more arrows into his siege crossbow. After a moment's hesitation, the troll knocked on the door then entered the inn. Sybil wasn't listening to anything, parts of her felt numb and the other parts felt sick. She wanted to throw up. Of course, she wanted to throw up, she was pregnant, and nauseous was a pregnant woman's default setting. Sam helped her off the coach.

_"How do you feel now?"_

_"I think this dress will have to go for dusters."_

He knew. Surely, he knew she'd been scared. He knew everything. If he really wanted he could have his way all the time, he just let her have her way because… because it probably amused him to do so. She smiled at Sam's expression.

_"I knew you'd come up with something, Sam. You go all slow and cold and that means something really dreadful's going to happen. I wasn't frightened." _

Keep telling yourself that, you little liar. Hissed a cruel part of Sybil's brain. Gods know, you can't fool him.

_"Really? I was scared shi—stiff."_

To keep herself from laughing, Sybil wondered out loud about what happened to Mr. Skimmer. She mentioned that he had been rummaging in his briefcase earlier. The main room of the inn was silent as they entered and Sybil was quite sure she could cut the tension with a knife. Everyone was staring at them, especially Sam, which was no wonder since he was covered in mud and blood. Oh and he was also holding that crossbow. As Sam looked down at himself, Sybil felt warm tears begin to run down her face.

She'd really hoped that she wouldn't cry after all this. At least, not until she was alone. She just hoped that Sam wouldn't notice. The inn keeper's wife stepped forward and took Sybil's hand from Sam's. Normally if someone had wanted to separate Sybil's hand from Sam's, they would have needed a crowbar, a flamethrower and several trolls but at the moment, Sybil could not handle the humiliation of Sam seeing weakness in her. But he did see. He saw her shaking and he saw the tears.

_"And… er… my wife is a bit shaken up."_

Her sensible side knew that he was merely concerned and probably a bit confused but that fanatically devoted side curled up into a little corner and prayed for death. How could she disappoint him this way? It demanded. She had made such a stink about how if the trip wasn't too dangerous for Sam then it wasn't too dangerous for her. She wanted to prove herself worthy. But she had failed. She wasn't sure when it was exactly that she failed but it had been even before the tears.

She heard people talking but she wasn't listening anymore. She was actually in the middle of wallowing in self-loathing but her heart still skipped a beat whenever she picked up Sam's voice, though it wasn't directed at her thus far. She didn't deserve a word from him. She didn't deserve even a look of disdain from him, that fanatic in her mind wailed. The berating was silenced when Sybil felt Sam's warm touch on her chin as he lifted it gently.

_"Are you all right, dear?" _

Had she heard right? Did he really call her dear? Sybil's sensible side bitch slapped her fanatical side. It was probably best to just let Sam decide if she was worthy or not. No sense in making oneself sick over it. Actually, with Sam near, Sybil didn't feel sick anymore and she was pretty sure she had stopped shaking. She still felt embarrassed about her behavior though.

_"Sorry to let you down, Sam. It was just so _awful_."_

Sam graced Sybil with a pat on the shoulder. She wouldn't have dared to hope for a kiss. She knew that he was shy about public displays of affection. She tilted her head down and smiled for a moment despite herself. If she looked up at him even for a second, she probably would kiss him herself and she didn't want to embarrass him. Even if it was very amusing and he was so endearing when he was embarrassed.

_"You just… I mean, Cheery will… and I'll… sort things out and be along right away. We'll get a good bedroom, I suspect." _

She nodded, unable to keep herself from smiling. She was still smiling when Sam walked away from her and stepped outside. She couldn't believe that she had actually felt fear or despair just moments ago. A few words from Sam melted all that away. They weren't even really eloquent or poetic words. They were worried and nervous, human basically. But words out of Sam's mouth impacted her like nothing else ever would.

The inn keeper's wife led Sybil to one of the bedrooms of the inn. Sybil looked around the room and chuckled. Sam had suspected correctly. It was a nice room. She sat down on the bed and absently patted her belly. She'd try to tell him when he came to bed. She changed out of her dress and into her nightgown while she waited. She turned down the covers and slipped into the warm, moderately soft bed. She fell asleep just as her head hit the pillow.


End file.
